It's election time again...so what do we do?

I like to think of myself as a pretty well informed citizen. I try not to lean one way or the other. Typically one party ends up being my end decision in most cases. Yet, it isn't because I see myself as representing a party. It's because my values, biblical values, are upheld the most by the candidate. Let's be honest... one man cannot solve the issues of this country, or this world.

So here we sit this October, engaged in this battle related to our political perspectives. We fight til we are red in the face to discuss what party is best. We compare their views and objectives  against society's views instead of God's views. Or we just don't care to vote at all. We skirt around issues if our candidate doesn't fully align with our personal beliefs when those beliefs should reach further than that. The question ultimately ends up being, "Where should God fall on this issue of politics?"

How should we handle our election of government officials? Why do we get so consumed with our political parties, that we forget our Kingdom? The power of men has divided the Church of Jesus Christ. God does expect us to be involved in politics. He doesn't expect us to be so corrupt in them so that we forget about the other Kingdom we are a part of. It does matter who we elect. But our way of thinking about it, and how we make our decisions needs to be evaluated. We are not for sale. We stand with God. God did not come to take sides. God is not a Democrat. He is not a Republican. He came to take over. 

Tony Evans calls out scripture in a discussion on this topic, in Joshua 5, in which I think we start to find an answer. In this scripture, it discusses how he has crossed into the promise land and is about to move forward. They are moving toward Jericho getting ready to fight. The man lifts up his eyes, and a man was standing opposite with a sword drawn in his hand. He asks,  "Are you with us, or against us?"  The reply is a plain and simple, "No. I indeed come as captain of the host of the Lord." The answer came back to Joshua, pretty much declaring,  "I am not on your side, or their side. I have my own program. Independent of both."

So is it wrong to be a Democrat? No. Republican? No.  When it starts to cross over to being "wrong" is when you stand for only what is Democrat or Republican. When you don't take the time to dig deeper on God's agenda and views instead of your own and society's. No one group, or thing for that matter, can have your total loyalty when you belong to another order. If you cannot see that a worldly view is not the answer, I do not believe you can ever fully be acting out a life as a Christian.

As soon as you disagree with God, I am going to disagree with you.We get caught up on topics like abortion. Yet we fail to also think about the fact that God's perspective is not just limited with 9 months of pregnancy. No, He is not in support of abortion. But it's bigger than that.  He's concerned with every single person's life from start to finish. There's a whole lot more of issues to tackle than just abortion when you think about it that way. So we sit here with our narrow viewpoints and perspectives, and wonder how and why our country continues to spiral out of control.

So what did Joshua do when this man represented a different agenda? He fell on his face to ask God what he wanted him to do. He was about to fight, and instead realized, he had it all wrong. He needed direction.

As a society we have it backwards. We think the issue is who's side is God on, or we just don't care about that at all. The right question, if you're a Christian, should be, "Who is more on God's side?" The beauty of asking that question, is that you then have to dig further to figure out what God's side is. My guess is on most issues you have never even thought about it that way. We are not called to or allowed to for that matter, take a position on what people here think, but only on what God says.

So let's remove the God piece for a second, and give a worldly perspective. What happens at a football game when a decision on a penalty is made? Does the crowd get to vote and determine if something was a penalty? No. What if they don't agree with the call? No.  We know that all too well after the replacement officials were brought in this year. People complained up and down, voiced their opinion, and knew in their hearts that the official's call was "wrong." But those officials have an objective standard and rule book in which to review. The objective standard will over rule what you think no matter how many people think it. Even if EVERY single person in the stands and on the field thinks otherwise, it isn't going to hold true. It's not going to change anything. You have to have an objective standard in life in order to function as you are intended to.That official, throughout all the trash talk, got a first hand look at what it means in the smallest of ways, what it might be like to be God. To not have people accept, appreciate, or agree with his views. But they're views all the same. Ultimately we will all have an opportunity to figure out how well we played by His rule book...and this is why I know God is in support of the candidate that best follows His.

Now, no party will ever fully reflect the Kingdom of God. It won't happen. So what is important? What do we do? I think the best place to start, is to determine which candidate/party will be able to increase the Kingdom's point of view. Think independently. Don't get caught up in fighting, who's better than who, or individual one-off issues.  Is the leader drawing from a Biblical view or not? Whichever candidate ends up being elected, they are ultimately not the one in control. But it is our responsibility to elect people that can best reflect our beliefs.

Thankful.

It's funny how sometimes we think life is just coasting along perfectly, and then all of a sudden it feels as though we've been thrown into this crazy cycle where absolutely everything is going wrong. I've seen so many of my friends undergo hardship this year. I have seen family hurt. People lose jobs. People with illness. People with debt. Broken hearts. People unable to start a family. People falling further from God. People unable to find a job. Yet, throughout this I have seen the good. I have seen friendships restored. I  have seen hearts soften. I have seen relatiosnhips repairing themselves slowly, but surely. It's easy to focus on the bad, but how often are we looking for the positive?

I've found that we are never going to be lacking the hardships, challenges, and daily struggles that present themselves each day. That's inevitable. What we do with these things however, is in our control. We can either try to solve the world's problems each day on our own... or we can know that God is in control, and eager to show you what doors he wants to open for you in your struggle. In fact, many times that struggle is the opened door...we're just too self-centered to realize it.

I'm lucky enough to have my faith to rely on to get me through hard times. I still struggle. I still get stressed. I am still judgemental. I still get angry. I still cry. I still fight with those I love most. However, at the end of the day, I know I am not in control. I'm human and I don't need to be perfect all the time. Even if there are the days I tried to be the one in control, I end up giving it up. There are days that I truly don't know how some people can overcome things like death, illness, financial ruin - without knowing Jesus as their savior. I would be a mess without that truth to hold on to. I know, I have been there.

My prayer this Easter, was not that everything would turn around for me. Not that I would start having less struggle to deal with...and this wasn't the case for my friends either. Although I pray daily for my friends to have their prayers answered in the ways they would like... I also pray that they will see the doors that are being opened for them in their struggles. I pray for God to show them clearly what he has in store for them. For Him to soften their hearts, take away their pride, and their determination to solve the issue on their own.

As I sat in this years Easter service...all I could think about were the people I know that are struggling, and how to best help them get to be in a more positive place. Jesus does not turn away if we have our ups and downs, if we fall, if we fail him sometimes. He loves us all the same, he sees the bigger picture. This is not to say he doesn't hurt when we hurt. He died for us, knowing fully well we would fail Him over and over again. How great of a world we would live in if we could do this for one another all the time.

Now, I can help in asking the right questions, being more supportive, and less judgemental.... but the biggest thing I can do is pray for them. Pray with them. Pray for them to be shown the comfort that only One can give them.

Today, I am thankful.

$2 dollar a day challenge

This week has been nothing short of an eye opener. There have definitely been ups and downs over the course of the last 4 days. FOUR days only and I have had so much to think about. (Mainly from being hungry ALL the time, but also from all the thoughts, conversations and actions that have taken place over this same duration.) God is working overtime in my heart and mind this week, and I haven't posted in awhile so I figured I should try and get these thoughts out somewhere where I can reflect on them later.

Our church tasked us with doing the $2 dollar a day challenge. A brief overview of what this is? Eating on $10 for the week. Nothing more. Nothing less. $10 per person. I figured it would be difficult. I figured my heart that is already compassionate towards people in poverty would be further opened up. I figured I would even learn something new. After the weeks end we will buy groceries with the money we didn't spend for the Mukwonago food pantry.

I expected the positive responses and encouragement I received over the week. What I did not expect was the varying negative  responses of anything from "Well half the world might live on $2 a day...but they also grow their own vegetables...they have food." to "This goes completely against my atheism to take part in this." My immediate reaction was to respond. My immediate reaction was to shake these people and tell them to wake up. That these problems are very real, but also very easily helped. God quickly spoke to me and reminded me I was not only learning compassion for those "less fortunate" than I, but also for those who didn't see things from my perspective. I took a step back, I let it go. I put my two cents in for sure, but I let it go.

Now, another thing happened that so clearly showed me the other side of someone's heart within that same 24 hours. I witnessed the goodness in peoples' hearts as well. I had people who gave me groceries to donate to the pantry that we're saving up our unspent dollars this week to buy for the Mukwonago food pantry. I had people talk to me about the issues in this city. People that said they'd like to do the same thing. This is nice in itself, but one person didn't just pull it from the pantry, they went out and bought them. To them that wasn't a big deal, but after the day before, it was done at the right time, and it will be a big deal for the family it goes to. Different reactions to the same cause.

There have been many conversations this week --serious ones and ones that were done jokingly. I have the priviledge of having a pretty open environment at work where this can be talked about freely.  All the while the wheels have been turning in my head. Examing myself, examining others. I've been offered I don't know how many goodies this week, but like I said, despite my large appetite and constant snacking habits, I'm finding this relatively easy. Yes, I do have some control when it comes to eating. So I've been doing lots of thinking. Thinking about the reality of our city of Milwaukee. About our world. About the brokeness. About the hope. What makes people "tick." Our God. My mother.

My mother. Now this topic as most of you know has had me at my highests and my lowests in my life. I've struggled with this for some time, and finally feel I have this issue in His hands, not mine. Yes, it only took about 6 years to do so... but I think I've gotten there. This week, I have been taught perhaps most by her. My mother is one of those people that over the last year has used food pantries. Who has been homeless. who is not mentally well. Someone of whom I had become deeply saddened by her situation. She has been living among those "less fortunate." She's experienced what these same people in our city face day in and day out. When I think about this, it's not hard for me to stick to my $2 a day. I've seen this reality all too close to home.

The thing that was most hard for me, was seeing people's reactions. People's reactions to those in need. More so people's lack of reaction to those in need. When did we become a people so consumed with our own well being? When did it become to easy to turn a blind eye to someone struggling? When I told my mother about the $2 a day challenge I expected what I think most people who recently were exposed to living in poverty might say. "Maybe they could help me... Yeah, that's exactly what I'm dealing with. So what?"

However, what I heard was very different. Very humbling. Very compassionate. My mother replied with, "That's great. There is a real need for that. My friends I've met at the hope house often go without food, and recently they were completely out. I hope that someone can help Jackie find some kind of a refrigerator. He needs something like that in his place. That would be great." Now Jackie is an alcoholic. A person who let my mother stay with him when she was without a place to stay. He's been suicidal. He is one of those people who doesn't go to a pantry, because he'd rather get beer. He's the person we all decide not to help the needy, because there are people like him out there.  However, here my mom is, now out of his place, out of that situation, and talking about his needs. Wow.

It hurts my heart when I hear people give excused for why someone doesn't deserve something. Truthfully, none of us deserve anything. It's not our place to judge a person, their situation, or how they're living their life. Everyone is doing something wrong in someone's eyes. That doesn't mean they don't have needs, wants and feelings. This truth was only more solidified for me in hearing her words.

This has been in my mind all week. I have chewed on it, reflected on it, and I think now am ready to write my two cents on it.

Perhaps those people "less fortunate" that are living in poverty...have the opportunity to be that much more close to having a relationship with God. In fact, part of me doesn't see them as less fortunate at all. Maybe they lack the essentials we want (this breaks my heart) but I see more and more often those same people being the one's who actually get it. Who understand what it means to be loving, compassionate people.

My mother who has next to nothing now, is concerned with everyone else, not just herself. I am not sure this would have been the case a few years ago. I have seen transformation there that I simply can't explain. I really believe that those less fortunate people, are the ones that might have it right. The ones that would less eagerly turn their back on someone in need. The one's that understand what it is to be compassionate. The one's that don't need that new pair of shoes to be happy. The one's that aren't too busy to help someone in need. Perhaps those of us who "have it all" simply are far too busy and far too filled with everything else to even make room to entertain the thought of God. We're unable to hear him when he does speak to us, because we're to consumed with things he doesn't value "important". God calls us to be a compassionate people. A people that love one another. In this challenge, it's been easier to see him working, easier to "get it." It's in those moments I wonder, who's really the less fortunate.

My heart broke when I heard some of the things said to me  this week... questioning if there was a real need. It really did. But what I didn't expect was for me to get a reality check and at the same time have God show me and make an example out of the fact that yes, these people need help, and yes you should definitely be doing that...but understand 1 thing. "I LOVE these people. I absolutely love them, and think they're perfect just like you. I'm working in their hearts just like I am working in yours. I've kept your mom safe all this time. Trust me." Humbled.

We wont ever be able to comprehend why things happen the way they do in this world, but I am definitely able to say there is always reason, there is always hope, and there is always a bigger picture we aren't completely aware of.

We live in a broken world.  A world where we find one excuse after another to say we don't have enough talent, we dont have enough time, we dont have enough energy. The truth is we do. The truth is we don't care enough. That needs to change. This challenge is just a glimpse into the false reality we live each and every day acting as though those around us aren't hurting and broken.

So my hope is not that you become a Christian from this post, or any other. My hope is not even that you do this challenge yourself (although i strongly encourage it.) The truth is being a christian is about having a relationship with God, with people.  My hope is that you start to open your eyes. To those around you. To those you shut out because you don't agree with them. To those that "sin". To those of a different gender, race, color or status. My hope is that you start to show God's love and compassion for everyone, not just a select crowd. In that, my hope is that you find Jesus. It is, but that is not the reason for my post. The reason for my post is simple, to expose the reality check I was exposed to this week.

This week my mom will be joining us at church. This is something I have prayed about for nearly 7 years since my parents divorce among a series of other events. This Sunday, the day we continue our talk on compassion, and just so happen to be reviewing our $2 dollar a day challenge. Ironic. The best part is I didn't ask. She actually said she'd like to come, after all the asking I have done. After all the ups and downs. After all the negativity even from her. Funny that is going to call on the day when the church is collecting all of that food for people in need, something my mother and her friend can relate to all too well. My mom and her friend will both be joining, and I couldn't be happier about that. It's not the solution to their problems, but it's a step in the right direction.  My hope is that they will be hearing the word of God, maybe clearer than they've ever heard the past few years...or maybe just as loud as they've been hearing it all along.  I can't help but smile.

Day of prayer - My prayer today

 I often find myself thinking about all the stuff I want to do in the future. Good things. Helpful things. Things that are going to make a difference—something with a real impact. These dreams are great to have, and I pray that someday I will be able to accomplish them.

However today, my short term goals are a little more simple. These goals are a little more close to home—something that will also have a real impact—right now.

All too often I find myself and my friends just sitting in this place of “wait.” This place of trying to figure out who I am, and what God’s purpose is for me in this life.  This is great that we think about this, but in reality I think we miss the big picture. I know I do sometimes. God didn’t make us to do one large grandiose accomplishment. We are one of his many. He wants us to live each day affecting the lives of those around us, praying for those around us, and loving those around us.

When I say around us I don’t mean just our friends and family. (Although this is where some of us need to start) I mean the guy down the street who just lost his wife, the guy in front of you whom just had his credit card get declined, the guy on the side of the road, the family in a shelter, the person who just lost their significant other in a tragic accident, the widow down the road. There are so many opportunities each and every day for us to make a difference…and it saddens me to see a day go by and feel like I didn’t do as much as I could have.

So today my focus is, on this national day of prayer is? To pray for those I tend to forget about, to ask God to open my heart to the point I can love those around me like he does, and to show compassion to people of all circumstances. To not look away when I see someone in distress. To give not only when I have extra, but when I am struggling myself. To hang out with those people most don't want to hang out with. To not be scared of people that are different, make me uncomfortable, or uneasy. To not say I don't have enough time in my super busy schedule to do the things that have been calling on my heart. My prayer is to represent my God, as He is, not what I hope to someday sort of be. So my prayer is to get out of this "wait" stage and take action.

As I write this, I think even more so, this is why we often get lost trying to find our one main purpose that God wants to use of for. Part of me wants to believe he laughs at this. The stress we put on ourselves to find out. When in reality...maybe our purpose is just that... to live a life serving others. In all circumstances. With no desire or expectation for it to be returned. Maybe we would all be much more happier, helpful, humble and trusting people if we took a step back--looked at things a little differently, and got out of the waiting game, and got on the field to play.

My prayer is to be shown when and how to do those large grandiose things God may have planned for my life… but more importantly to let my arrogance be set aside, and to have my eyes opened to the small ones that I think we all too often dismiss as someone else’s problem. We’re all broken. We’re all human. We all have NO idea when we’re going to be meet Jesus. Therefore, my goal is to stop trying to figure out what my purpose as a “whole” is and start making my life whole by living in Him and for Him each day. That is the new plan of attack, and I pray you’ll be inclined to do the same.

Jersey Shore

Because MTV decided to stop playing music and started airing reality shows years ago...this show was birthed. Its been a formula MTV has used over and over and every "cast" member finds their role, plays it and then tries to get their 15 minutes in the sun. I remember days where I actually used to watch that station and would be able to hear a song... I don't think that has happened since I flipped the channel and happen to switch past the MTV music awards.

 The reason for my take on this show, is that I really can't stand to hear any more about it...and don't understand why it has become as popular as it has. I get the fact that it can be "funny" to see people so different from ourselves. I get that it might be "entertaining" to see these people get into stupid situations, and make bad decisions. However, it saddens me that this is the case. I am all for a comedy show. I am all for entertainment. There are plenty of "reality shows" that I actually enjoy. However, it's an embarrassment to the state, to Italians and the human race to watch what goes on in this show, and to realize that it is the default topic to talk about among middle, high school and college aged people. It scares me a little to think about the fact that we live in a time where the "conversation" we have with eachother now entails what someone's status said on facebook, what pictures they posted, what their relationship "status" has changed to, who Snookie slept with last night, or what additional girl the "Situation" has taken home for the night.

I remember being younger, when people actually called their friends to hang out, to find out what was going on. I remember when people actually went out and did things. When they enjoyed being outdoors. When they took more time to be there for and care for eachother. It wasn't that long ago, however looking at most of the shows, blogs, and information we see pouring through our smartphones...it seems like it sure was.

One could argue, that people need to lighten up, and that it is only a show. However, my argument to that is just the SAME thing. It is just a show. It isn't completely reality. It is partially scripted. It is the extreme. And it isn't your typical real life situation. Sitting at a starbucks yesterday, I heard some kids ranging from 16-19 just talking about Jersey shore, Facebook, relationships gone bad, one-night stands, and many other things. Like it was nothing. Like it was a part of THEIR everyday lives. Because it was. Yes, it is just a show. But when that show/s becomes all you talk about, and all you can find commonality about... you start to make decisions based upon those things you see. That is what I find disheartening. To hear these people talking about someone that was going to be dying in a month due to health issues, and then saying oh well, did you see the last episode of Jersey shore, and continuing on like nothing was wrong... just was the last straw on holding back writing my opinion of this show. MTV has been putting trash on its station for years, but it truly has taken the cake these past few years.

Yes, some people will make the right decisions, because they see how stupid these people are. Some people learn stuff from 16 and pregnant. The reality is people do need to hear some of that information... but part of th reason they aren't hearing it where they should be, at home and from family...is because we have become so dependent on the media, news, and internet to supply our information, and even to have our "conversations". Most people loosen up their morals because of it.

I watched one episode and turned it off. Only one of these people is even from NJ. I cant imagine that in some time, these people will watch this back and not be ashamed for acting like this. There is a reason sponsors are pulling their ads and the town has come out to speak out against the show. Because its offensive and disgusting.

I ask...You answer.

As most of you are all aware, I have been nothing short of busy these past few months. There have been ups and downs--and most of the time it felt like more downs than ups. I've always seemed to be the type of person that puts a whole lot on her plate, and always ends up finishing it all. It's just the process in getting there that sometimes changes, or can get stressful.

I think this is pretty common for most people. We live our busy lives--work, school, social life, we structure our day--planning everything right down til the last minute, and if we're really good--we even incorporate time for those that love us, those that are in need, and those that are far from God--volunteering, family functions, praying, church etc.

Everything goes along smoothly until one of those things goes out of whack. All of a sudden we find it harder to do every other item on our list. We start to get stressed. We start to worry. We start to think about how we ever got so many things on that list in the first place. It happens all the time.

The thing I have been thinking about lately however is how I handle this busy schedule I have made for myself. In thinking about it, how can I better improve how I handle that schedule. How can remain at peace, show God's grace in all that I do, and reach out to those I don't know to help them as well. I have always felt a strong calling on my heart to help others. It's in my nature. I am a good listener, communicator, time-balancer. However, even those of us who are graced with this ability to multi-task get tired. In my case, very tired. Don't get me wrong. I'm very happy being tired... :) Just looking at how I can better improve this busy, hectic life.

Two of many topics that I want to talk about are below. I found a few verses that I feel tie into the topics pretty well:

Weariness


Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)

Often times I get busy. I forget where my focus is, and always has been. I forget to keep God at the center. Somewhere in the process of trying to show his love to everyone...it is possible to lose sight of him. Setting aside specific time to pray is important to me, because sometimes it is exactly what I need to bring me back in, and provide me the guidance and direction I need--not to mention a sense of peace.

Worry

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.

1 Peter 5:7 (NLT)

We all worry. Some more than others--and I am willing to bet I am in the top percentile with this one. I have always struggled with putting my problems and trials completely in God's hands. Where do I draw the line? How much effort am I suppposed to put in? How does God want to use me in this situation? What is God trying to do in this situation? Perhaps, I ask too many questions. Part of me thinks God and I are going to have a good laugh at how many questions I ask one day.

I feel I have done a better job lately, at removing stress from my life. I am still working on making my schedule a little less hectic, but for now... I seem to be able to balance it. Rather, God seems to be helping me balance it.

Anyways, just had a few thoughts on my mind... and figured I would share, because I know I am not alone on this one.

Direction

What a week. I found myself scouring the state of Wisconsin for any place or service that could be of some service to my mother. I had my plate full, and at times definitely was overwhelmed....somewhere in that process though, I found support, I found a way to tackle the situation. And I'm very thankful my prayers were answered...and for everyone else who joined me in prayer. As I mentioned, I finally found this place called the Hebron House. Somewhere my mother could stay temporarily, and depending on how her stay goes, she may be able to get further help and assistance with the issues that really need to be addressed.

My stress levels seemed to decrease little by little, and as more people stepped up to offer support, and as more things began to fall into place...I saw my prayers being answered slowly but surely. I can't really pinpoint the time in which I went from "paralyzed to completely mobile" but I can tell you there was a definite change in my overall demeanor, outlook, and attitude. I have a sense of peace. One I am not sure I have ever had before. A kind of peace that can only come from my maker. A kind of peace that no matter how bad the situation might be, I know he's there and has a plan for all this in the end...and that he has all along.

But for now, this temporary solution seems to be okay. It's actually a house, and it's nice inside. The kitchen is shared, and all food is everyone's. There's a lot. They have access to the phone, they are on the busline, and they will be assigned a case worker. She didn't hate it, and that's a plus.

It's not going to be easy. There are going to be more downs that ups. My mom is probably going to get angry with me, my family might to, some people will understand, some wont, some will help out, some will watch from a distance, and others will just continue to completely ignore the situation as they have in the past. However, it doesn't matter. I realized last night, that even if it was just only me giving my mother some help, with the help of my God, I can do that. In a week I have seen more transformation in the situation than  I have in 7 years. In less than a year, our relationship has somewhat been restored.

No, she isn't healthy yet, and maybe she never will be...but she knows I love her. She's laughed this week. She's smiled. She's said thank you. She's trying to get her life together - whether she knows why it has fallen apart or not. She also knows I love this man called Jesus. She sees my actions, and sees the actions of everyone else around her. She sees me working hard for her. She sees something. In that, she's a little more hopeful. A little more trusting, and who knows maybe will be more open with her case worker that she meets today. She also agreed to check out Brooklife church. I've been trying to make that happen again for a long time. She's lost her way, I'm not quite sure where she stands on the topic, and I want to help guide her back.

So tonight I will go visit. Spend some time with my mother, and the other members of the Hebron House tonight. Because at the end of the day she's still my mother. At the end of the day she can still laugh, or cry or be angry...and I'd like to make it be that she laughs, and is happy and somewhat at peace.

Yes, I have another agenda...to help her seek medical help, get insurance, eventually find work again, etc. Hopefully that will come in time. But like all of us, when things are going badly, we don't always want to focus on them...nor should we. Sometimes we need a break...a good laugh...just time for some unjudged and unconditional love. My time with her doesn't always have to be stressful, I don't always have to feel pain. Neither does she. God's been there all along, I know this -- or she more than likely wouldnt still be here today.

That's my goal for tonight. Maybe watch a movie in this house with people who God loves just as much as you and me. People whom don't have the best situation in life, but if they have a story just like my mother does, I'd like to hearit if they want to share. Perhaps I have more to learn there, than most other places I might spend any other given night. I'm guessing I do. Sometimes the thing that seems too obvious... showing His love, and acting as Jesus would in any given situation, can help lead that person to finding peace in Him. I'm thinking its a combination of doing the obvious, and doind the neessary research to get her some help. Perhaps that was His plan all along. Either way, I am looking forward to spending an evening with 13 beautiful adults, and 14 beautiful children tonight.

Lastly, I have my own thank you, to God, for giving me strength, passion, compassion, peace, and a number of other things. Right up there with that thank you however, is to my mother. A thank you I may never give you to your face, unless you end up getting the help you need. But a thank you for making me who I am today. For making me a person who is more patient, more compassionate,better at handling problems and challenges, better and problem solving, better at managing my time. You've helped me do this. Without your struggles, I would have never been as well-rounded as I am today. Without your struggles, I would never be able to help someone in your situation. Without you I would be a little more judgemental, a little more impatient, and whole lot worse at handling stress. Without your struggles, I may not have pushed myself so hard through school. I may not have received honors. I may not be going back for my Master's. It is becauuse of you and my father that I want to be better. That I want to lead a better life. Without you I may have not found my way back to God.

So for that, I thank you.